Hey Jennifer, you trying to smuggle
cantaloupes under your shirt?
Somebody wake Freud up. What does it say about me that this
poll is the first one since the original in which I have voted
for the eventual winner? Oedipal complex? Not breast fed? I don’t
know. Pick your psychobabble. I think I just know a great rack
when I see it.
Connelly obviously qualifies for this honor. I remember seeing
The Hot Spot in college and thinking that she had the most
perfect chest I had ever seen. Nine years later, I still think
that’s true. She hasn’t shown them nearly enough in my
opinion. She’s no Streep, but I guarantee she could work a
lot more if she were willing to let the puppies out for some
fresh air more often.
Her boobs qualify as the best in my opinion for three reasons.
First, they are real. Second, they are real. And third, they are
real. I personally feel that a rack should be inherited, not
purchased. I got several emails saying that Pamela Anderson and
Demi Moore’s artificially enhanced chests did not belong in
the same poll with the naturals. I agree with that to a certain
extent but I know guys who actually prefer the marvels of modern
science. So I thought we would just let the voters make up their
own minds. It seems to have worked out pretty well.
I think that the highest faker was Kari Wuhrer. She obviously
has had help from her friendly neighborhood plastic surgeon, but
the only others before her that may have had the implants are
Denise Richards and Alyssa Milano. Can I get in trouble for
putting her in this poll? I guess not if we don’t show any
pictures. Denise and Alyssa are troublesome. If they are fake,
they look really good. I have only seen Denise in Wild Things
just like everyone else and it was difficult to tell. Alyssa’s
seem to have enough natural sag to suggest hers came from a dip
in the gene pool. I don’t know. What do you think?
I was surprised that Elizabeth Hurley didn’t receive more
support (that’s a terrible pun). Scoop’s favorite Brit,
Hugh Grant, has said they were the best in the Isles. They are
pretty fantastic but only eleven people thought they were the
best.
Is it just me or do boobs look different these days? Have you
ever noticed in those old bunny mags from like the ‘60’s
how they all seem to have magnets in the nipples and point north?
Was that a result of the bra style at the time? I have always
wondered about that one. Maybe the good Uncle or a reader can let
me know about that.
The next poll is the second installment of the movie of the 90’s
poll. This time, we go for the funny bone. Which movie made you
laugh the hardest or made you laugh and think at the same time?
The Gist and I did our best to include all the movies we thought
belonged. We more than likely failed, though, to include all the
deserving nominees. If there is one that you want to vote for
that is not on the list, email me and I will eat the crow in the
follow up article OR if it’s good enough, I will add it into
the poll midstream. I rarely do that but if something obvious is
not on there, I will.
Comments and suggestions to lawdogusc@hotmail.com.
Keep those letters coming.
| Jennifer
Connelly |
 18.3% - (135 Votes) |
| Mimi
Rogers |
8.4% - (62 Votes) |
| Jamie
Lee Curtis |
6.7% - (50 Votes) |
| Denise
Richards |
6.6% - (49 Votes) |
| Heather
Graham |
5.9% - (44 Votes) |
| Salma
Hayek |
5.4% - (40 Votes) |
| Alyssa
Milano |
5.4% - (40 Votes) |
| Kari
Wuhrer |
5% - (37 Votes) |
| Angelina
Jolie |
4.2% - (31 Votes) |
| Rosanna
Arquette |
3.1% - (23 Votes) |
| Catherine
Bell |
2.9% - (22 Votes) |
| Mathilda
May |
2.8% - (21 Votes) |
| Kelly
Preston |
2.7% - (20 Votes) |
| Krista
Allen |
2.4% - (18 Votes) |
| Joan
Severance |
2% - (15 Votes) |
| Elisabeth
Shue |
2% - (15 Votes) |
| Rose
McGowan |
2% - (15 Votes) |
| Drew
Barrymore |
1.6% - (12 Votes) |
| Kim
Basinger |
1.6% - (12 Votes) |
| Elizabeth
Hurley |
1.4% - (11 Votes) |
| Romane
Bohringer |
1.3% - (10 Votes) |
| Virginia
Madsen |
1% - (8 Votes) |
| Uma
Thurman |
0.9% - (7 Votes) |
| Madonna |
0.9% - (7 Votes) |
| Demi
Moore |
0.6% - (5 Votes) |
| Kate
Winslet |
0.6% - (5 Votes) |
| Beverly
D’Angelo |
0.5% - (4 Votes) |
| Samantha
Fox |
0.5% - (4 Votes) |
| Pam
Grier |
0.5% - (4 Votes) |
| Susan
Sarandon |
0.4% - (3 Votes) |
| Lisa
Marie |
0.4% - (3 Votes) |
| Patricia
Arquette |
0.4% - (3 Votes) |
| Pamela
Anderson |
0.2% - (2 Votes) |
| Rosie
Perez |
0% - (0 Votes) |
Total Votes: 737 |